Life Isn’t Fair, So What! All That Matters Is Who You Are


We have all heard it before and we have all probably uttered it a time or two in our lifetime, “Life isn’t fair. While this may be true, obsessing over this point likely won’t get you too far in life. If you want to thrive and achieve any success you must learn how to shift your focus from the fact that life isn’t fair to the most important thing impacting your personal success, and that thing is you. By focusing on who you are you have the ability to channel your power into actionable progress and ultimately success.

Develop Self-Awareness To Live A Better Life

In order to tap into your abilities, you have to know who you are. Self-awareness is a system of reflection that allows us to develop a deep understanding of our inner thoughts, feelings, desires, motivations, behaviors, and actions. It is by implementing a regular process of checking in with ourselves to understand how we are thinking and feeling, what is driving our desires and motivations, and what lies behind the actions that then gives us the power to make changes within ourselves.

When we are empowered with the necessary information about ourselves we can begin to identify patterns in our thinking and behaviors that are not serving us and make changes to those patterns in a meaningful way that moves us forward (Waters, 2013).

Believe in Your Abilities

A belief in what you are capable of is essential to being able to tap into the power of who you are. When you understand what you are able to do, you are more likely to put yourself in situations and take chances that will result in favorable outcomes.

Self-awareness can significantly support this process by making you aware of your strengths, thus giving you critical information about your abilities. It is this knowledge of your strengths that can help you overcome challenges and make strides towards your goals. Research supports this by showing that those who have a high level of confidence in their abilities have a greater ability to manage stress and are more resilient in the face of trauma (Cherry, 2020).


Find Your ‘Why’

When dealing with hardships, tapping into your ‘why’ or purpose for something is often the backbone needed to offer support when life is unfair. Finding your ‘why’ serves as motivation in the midst of the discouragement and demotivation that dealing with unfairness in life can bring. It is the purpose behind why you are pursuing a specific goal or fighting for a certain cause that will energize you, keep you focused, and ultimately ensure you don’t stop until you reach your ultimate target (Cherry, 2020).

Set Goals For Your Life

Setting goals is another way to focus more on yourself than your circumstances in a manner that is going to produce actionable results. Setting goals takes the issue at hand, analyzes it, and breaks it down in a way that makes tackling it more feasible and manageable.

This allows efforts and energy to be better invested because the goal can be conquered bit by bit. Then, as success is achieved within each of the smaller established goals, confidence is increased, and motivation is gained towards completion of the larger goal. This continues to fuel your inner drive to work until the larger goal is met, ultimately driving progress (Cherry, 2020).

While there is no way to avoid the lack of fairness life sometimes has to offer, if you spend more of your energy looking at the power and abilities you have within, you’ll be able to tap into what you need to conquer challenges and overcome adversity. It is when we recognize the strength within ourselves that we become truly powerful.


Cherry, K. (2020, January). Use these 10 tips to improve your resilience. Verywell Mind.

Waters, B. (2013, May 21). 10 traits of emotionally resilient people. Psychology Today.

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